Vegeta: The Art of Planking
by Parkway Dr
Summary: The new fad of planking doesn't sit too well with Vegeta when he finds his own son committed to it, or will it? :P


Another day's worth of training completed as Vegeta stepped out of the gravity chamber, a towel wrapped around his shoulders. It was a nice day outside, except for one thing.

"What... What is that foolish child doing?"

Vegeta was in complete confusion. There, in the middle of the walkway in the front of his home was his eight-year old son, Trunks. Only this time, he wasn't standing... or sitting, or anything of the sort. He was lying flat on his face, like a board, like a _plank_.

"Trunks!" he called to him. "What is the meaning of this? Get off of the floor, you look ridiculous!"

Trunks said nothing.

"Hey! Can you hear me, child? Quit laying on the ground like some sort of baffling decoration!"

"Not right now, Dad. I'm busy."

"What? Busy doing what, exactly?"

"I'm planking."

_He's what?_ the prince thought to himself. "What is this _planking_?"

"Oh, it's real easy. All you do is lay on something, flat on your stomach. Like a real plank, pretty cool, huh?"

"That's it?"

"Yep. That's it. It's cool cause you can take pictures of yourself doing it in different places and-"

"There is nothing _cool_ about playing a ridiculous game, where you are a ridiculous plank!" he roared at his son, still planking on the ground. "Is there any legitimate plan behind any of this? Do you actually hope to somehow become stronger, or gain a sense of balance by doing this... _planking_?"

"Not really."

"THEN WHY ARE YOU DOING IT?"

"Oh." Trunks finally got up, sitting down with his legs crossed. "Goten showed me. We were watching a really cool video on the computer and these guys do it all over the world. One guy even _died_ doing it on a really tall building."

"A man died doing this planking?" he asked. "I'll be back, son. Wait here." he said before heading inside.

**X X X**

About ten minutes later, Vegeta exited the shower wearing his one-piece blue jumpsuit. Stepping into the living room, his eyes set on his wife, who was watching television.

"Woman!"

Bulma rolled her eyes. "Yes, your highness, WHAT can I do for you?"

"Did you know that our son is planking?"

"Oh! There's actually something on the news about that, come here, look." she said.

Vegeta stepped over to the side of the couch, watching a brief segment on the new craze known as planking.

"Isn't that funny? People all over the world do this thing, and take pictures of it."

"It's not funny!" Vegeta snapped. "What person in their right mind would lay themselves flat like a... like a _plank_, and just lay there, when there is nothing to be gained from it! It is absolutely meaningless! It even has less class than _any_ of the Ginyu Force poses!"

"Oh give it a break, Vegeta, it's nice that Trunks is doing little kid things and not training to be a warrior like his father is."

"Little kids do not lay on the ground pretending to be a pathetic piece of wood for an unknown amount of time!" he huffed as he walked to the front door, opening it. "No son of mine is going to waste his childhood years away by pretending to be an absurd piece of hardware! I, the prince of ALL Saiyans shall- Trunks?" he glanced around, his face clueless to his son's whereabouts. "Son! Where are you? I told you to stay put!"

He checked around the front yard, even on the roof. He checked in the back, inside again, and even in his room. Finally, he came back to his wife. "Woman, where is my son?"

"Are you ever going to learn my name?" she scoffed. "He went to go play with Goten. I think they're planking."

Vegeta growled at the idea of now two people laying flat like a board. When would it end?

"I'm going to go get him."

"Why? Just let him play with Goten, he hardly gets to see him since you have him training all the time!" But by the time she said that, Vegeta was gone.

**X X X**

When Vegeta landed by Goku's house, no one was home, from the looks of it. He stepped over to the side, nothing. He peeked in through the window, nothing.

"Damn it. Where is that clown, Kakarot?"

"Hey, Vegeta!"

"What?"

Vegeta looked up to see Goku on the roof of his home... planking on the edge.

"Kakarot!" he shouted. "Why are you up there planking like a buffoon?"

"Aw come on, Vegeta, it's fun! Come plank with me!"

"No. I'm here for my son, this madness has to stop! Now tell me where he is or I'll plank you into another dimension!"

"I don't know. We're playing hide and go plank, and Goten's supposed to find us."

"AGH!" Vegeta roared, the stress clearly getting to him about this new fad. "Hide and go PLANK? Kakarot have you gone mad?"

"Come on, it's something the boys really like. You should join in, I bet Trunks would really like it!"

"No! No more! I will not let my son, a proud Saiyan warrior, lower himself to imitating a blasted plank!" he turned around, trying to sense his son's power. "Trunks! Where are you?"

Nothing.

"Gah!" he sneered. "Trunks! Tell me where you are right now or I'll take away your allowance for the rest of the year!"

Immediately Trunks' power went up. Vegeta knew it was closed, following it by foot until he finally came to it.

"Trunks! What in the world do you think you are doing?"

"I'm planking, Dad. Didn't Mom tell you?" Trunks replied as he laid flat on the side of a tree near the house.

"No, son, enough is enough! I cannot allow my only child to become a piece of lumber! Now come on, we're going home!-"

"It was Goku's idea to do it."

"What?" Vegeta froze. "Kakarot's idea?" Then, it hit him. _Of course! This only **appears** to be a simple childish game. Could Kakarot have come up with an ingenious way to train himself while lying so still... ?_

"I'll see you at home, don't be late for dinner."

"What? Dad, where are you going?"

"Back home, son. To train."

Vegeta walked over to the edge of the roof of the house and lifted himself up, Goku still laying flat as a board. "I see what you're up to, Kakarot. And if it's a race to the next level you want, it's a race to the next level you'll get!" and with that, Vegeta, flew off back towards his home, which wasn't actually his home, since it was Bulma's and her family's. But she didn't tell him that.

"Found you, Daddy!" Goten cheered as he jumped on the roof. "Hey, was that Trunks' dad?"

"Yep." Goku said, sitting up. "I think it finally grew on him."

"What grew on him?"

Goku sighed. "Nothing, son. Let's go find Trunks."

"Okay!"

**X X X**

Later that evening, after dinner, Bulma made her way back to the gravity room, hoping to pry her husband away from his training to go to bed early for a change.

"I swear, that man is going to wish he spent more time with us, and with me when he sees how old I get. Ugh."

She stepped up to the door and opened it. As usual, the inside was completely red, the gravity cranked up to 500X, but she wasn't worried since she was standing outside.

She glanced around, wondering where Vegeta was. There was no fighting, jumping, shouting, ki blasts, nothing. Just complete silence, aside from the humming of the machine.

"Vegeta?" she called. "I'm going to bed, are you coming?"

"Not now, woman, can't you see I'm busy?"

Bulma followed his voice until she saw her husband, flat on the floor... like a... like a board.

"Vegeta! Are you okay? What happened?" she called, almost stepping in before realizing she would be crushed almost immediately.

"I'm fine, now leave me, woman, I'm training."

"Training?" she took a closer look, then her eyes shot open. "Vegeta, are you planking?"

"YES! AND ONLY THE MOST ELITE OF WARRIORS CAN PLANK AT 500X GRAVITY, NOW LEAVE ME!"

She wanted to be mad at him for yelling, but she couldn't. The site was too hilarious.

Vegeta, the prince of all Saiyans, was now a planker.

**END!**

Hope you liked XD I sure had fun writing this. Please review, thanks!


End file.
